Hollywood, Curse You

Is it something I’ve done Hollywood, did I insult you someway. Why is it every time I step out of a theatre I feel like I just got the kiss of death? I want to demand my money back but am too weak even to cause a scene. Why do you do this to me Hollywood, we use to be friends. Remember how I wasted my childhood staring at your idiot box for days without end. What’s happened to you?
Everything is a sequel, prequel, remake, or based on a book or actual events. Everything is a story of a athlete or dancer (or stomp the yarder) who tries against impossible odds to achieve his/her(but mostly his) dreams. Or maybe a cautionary story how some punk starts from the nothing works his way up the specified ladder, becomes corrupted by the power, then either ends up dead or in jail or all of his friends thinking he’s a tool. Or maybe an action movie with terrorists, that’s real relevant. Nothings original.
This was easily one of the worst summer movie seasons on record. It started with a bang, the highest grossing movie ever also one the biggest pieces of tripe ever. Spiderman 3 is the equivalent of very old swiss cheese; interesting colors to look at, but full of holes and bad in taste. Didn’t even bother seeing Shrek 3. Had to knaw off my leg during Fantastic Four 2 like a trapped coyote to survive. Transformers was passable but had more filler then a cheese Danish. If you put an infinite number of pirates in a room, with an infinite number of quills, and infinite supply of rum they still would not be able to make bow or stern out of Pirates of the Caribbean 3. I spent half my time covering my ears, and the sea battle at the end was nowhere near mind blowing enough to warrant all that nonsense. I just saw the raciest trollop of The Kingdom and I finally understood why terrorists want to kill us, so that we’ll stop making masochistic nightmares like that.
And of course people defended travesties such as this saying you just got to turn your brain off to enjoy it. (!) Well some of us can’t do that! Are we so use to Hollywood’s miscarriages that we can just write off terrible movies as business as usual? They should be spending that $200 million budget on a script worth filming instead of more special effects then the O’Reilly Factor. People, we need to better our standards, else all we’ll ever get is more X-Man 3s and Norbits.