Why I Hate My Generation

Welcome to the first young-adult generation of the 21st century, a generation so artistically stagnant and lazy that the self appointed ‘Music’ Television can only seem to regurgitate cookie reality TV, transferring all of it’s music videos to secondary stations. Where every single music genre worth mentioning are hand me downs of hand me downs that simply are meant for our times. Like finding you fathers old bomber jacket in your attic, looks awesome, but just ain’t your size.
Hippyism (at this point it’s practically worthy of recognition by the IRS as a deductible religion) is three generations old, Punk is two (Green Day, you are not punk, until I see track lines on you retinas keep you mouth shut), Hip-Hop is over one, Techno was never real music, and even the prudish menagerie of Indie Rock had it’s brief hay day with our eldest siblings. They all reached the pinnacle of their potential but it seems still uninspired artists feel alright riding these dead art forms into the ground.
Hell, the only music genre that can even past as ‘new’, as our ‘generation’s unique voice’ is Emo, and to even refer to that corporately mass-produced, self defecating pox on the earth as a form music is a blasphemy against God’s gift of the inner ear.
Are we so starved for creativity that the only two options on the radio are lousy tribute bands of music from antiquity or trust-found babies whining about how their girlfriend dumped them for men whose hair doesn’t look like that of a surprised turkey. Even in my own bellowed SKA scene, previously upstanding bands would rather op down to do some idiotic/ironic 80’s pop song cover then spend their worthy time on expanding their sound (I’m looking at you Reel Big Fish).
Listen musicians of America, I’m not asking you to do anything that difficult, I don’t even care what you do, it could be a whole EP with nothing but washboard music and armpit sounds (that would be awesome!), just as long as it’s new.